By Emma McDonald
As a teacher without any children of my own, I always knew in my heart that I should keep the parents of my students better informed and more involved in the classroom, but I didn't really understand
why until I became a parent myself. My professors, mentor teachers, and the principal all told me that it was IMPERATIVE that I keep the parents informed, but they never took the time to explain why. So, I'm taking these few bytes to explain from my perspective the why's of keeping parents informed and involved.
First of all, one thing I never realized until I became a parent myself was how involved parents actually are with their children's lives. Almost every moment of your life is dedicated to caring for, being with, and loving your children. The moment that child comes into your life, you spend endless hours feeding, holding, burping, bouncing, and playing! How can you not be concerned about every aspect of their life when you have worked so hard to get them to where they are? As a result, I now continually worry about whether or not the teacher will like my son, or if the other kids will like him. Will they pick on him or will he be a "pal"? Will he excel in school or will he be a problem? Will the teacher see the extraordinary amount of potential in him that I do, or will she simply label him as an overly active child? All of these are my concerns and above all I want him to do well. I want him to be the absolute best he can be. I want him to grow up relatively normal, get a good job, find a lovely girl to marry and have a nice family. In short, I want him to be happy. I would do anything to help him get to the point where he is not only able to do for himself, but he is happy with his life. Unfortunately, once he goes off to school I have limited control to what he encounters during the day. This is a HUGE concern and worry for me and, I would surmise, for most parents.
Not only that, but what will people think of me as a person and as a parent? Whether we like it or not, most parents are judged by their children. Were we too lenient or too strict? Were we not involved enough or too involved? There is a fine line to walk and unfortunately one that is laden with judgments by other people. It is hard not to be concerned with what other people think. Every comment made by my son's teacher feels like either a song of praise or a dagger in my heart. "He did better than expected."
Joy o' joy! He is doing great! "He isn't getting along with others."
What have I done wrong? Now, while this seems silly that the parent takes these things personally, that is just the way it is. We see our children as extensions of ourselves and so everything that the child does or that happens to the child happens to us as well.
Now that you can see how absolutely most parents are wrapped up in their children's lives, can you also see why it is important for them to know what is going on during the school day? If my son is not doing well in school, I want to know about it so that I can try and either do something to correct the problem, or to help my son however I can. If I don't hear anything then I am going to assume that all is well and that there is nothing to worry about. However, if I then get a report card with poor behavior comments and poor grades I am going to be fuming! How in the heck can I help him if I don't know what is going on? This isn't to say that I should leave it all up to the teacher, but personally (and I know many parents who feel this way), I don't want to be a big bother and pain to him/her. As a teacher myself, I know how much there is to do and the last thing I would want to do is become a nuisance to another teacher. See how complex it all is? It is like we are all performing a dance with intricate steps and yet no one really knows how the dance should be performed. Strangle analogy, I know, but there you have it.
To finish this line of thought, here are some well researched reasons why you should keep parents informed and involved:
- Students strive for a higher level of academics such as:
- earning better grades
- completing enriched course work
- enrolling in honors classes
- setting long term goals for themselves
- participating in extra-curricular activities that enhance learning
- Students tend to avoid negative behavior trends such as:
- taking drugs
- running with a gang
- bullying other students
- giving in to peer pressure
- committing criminal activity
- leading classroom disruptions
- Students have a higher level of participation in school and community activities such as:
- clubs
- athletics
- music
- church/religious activities
- community service
- Additionally:
- Teachers experience more support and appreciation from parents
- Parents feel a new appreciation for the commitment and skill of teachers
- Schools are able to access a variety of resources from parents
For some tips on how to keep your parents better informed and more involved in the classroom, read our tip entitled
"How to Inform and Involve Parents".
Also, check out the book
ABC's of Effective Parent Communication.
